TRAILER TRASH: Alien Edition!

VAULT VLOG: The Alien Prequel Is a Bad Idea, and Enough with the 3-D Already

District 9 Does NOT Disappoint

[Tonight, a very special reader-submitted review of the incredible new flick District 9, first published a few days ago on Day of the Woman. Loyal Vault Dweller Wendy Winant Bodine sent this in to me--enjoy, and check out the movie at your earliest convenience...]

As a witness to the viral video campaign for this film for the past 6 months (it’s been going on for at least over a year now), I had some idea of what District 9 was going to be about probably a bit more so than those who hadn’t noticed the campaign. But that still didn’t prepare me for much of what was witnessed at the midnight showing I attended last weekend. I also knew that producer Peter Jackson wouldn’t let me down, having been a fan of not only the Lord of the Rings trilogy, but his earlier horror work with Braindead (1992) and Bad Taste (1987). And the short film by fledgling director Neill Blomkamp upon which the film was crafted (“Alive in Joburg” (2005)) left enough of a pleasant aftertaste to make one look forward to the cinematic buffet that is District 9.

The film tells of a race of aliens whose mothership comes to rest directly over Johannesburg, South Africa, sometime in the early '80s. After several days with no action on the aliens’ part, humans make their way to the ship and literally drag the occupants out under the pretense of helping them. They set them up in what was supposed to be a temporary facility that quickly grew into the slum known as “District 9”. Heavily regulated and living in squalor, the aliens just want to be left alone, or better yet, to be allowed to return to their ship, although the humans keep insisting that them leaving is not an option. While the humans in charge of District 9 talk continually of their desire to help the aliens, the real motive is to gain access to their highly-advanced weaponry. The aliens are so hard pressed, they willingly trade their technology for food. All their technology is useless to humans, however, as it is all biologically based on the alien’s DNA—only they can use it.

Enter Wikus van der Merwe, an executive at Multi-National United (MNU), the mega-corporation hired by the government to take charge of the upcoming relocation of the aliens to “District 10”, a supposedly better living area. Wikus and his team, assisted by MNU mercenaries lead by the malicious Obesandjo 7, attempt to serve the aliens with eviction notices to make the move as uncomplicated as possible. While inspecting one shack, Wikus runs across a vial of black fluid, which he unwittingly sprays into his face. This is the turning point for the future of aliens and humans alike, as the chemical spreads into Wikus’ system, altering his DNA and slowly morphing him into an alien. When MNU becomes aware of this, they seize him and, rather than trying to save him, force him to test alien weaponry, which he does reluctantly but successfully. MNU plans to dissect him for further study, to see how alien DNA can be merged with human so that humans can use alien technology. Wikus escapes and finds sanctuary in the only place he can—District 9.

This movie is a breath of fresh air in a long-stale movie atmosphere of too many remakes and sequels, of brain-dead bathroom humor and teen-oriented romances. My main pleasure was finding out how intelligent this movie is—it doesn’t insult the audience by relying solely on high-tech special effects and an over-abundance of violence. To be sure, such elements exist, but in the proper ratio to an actual PLOT, something that’s been lacking in mainstream sci-fi for too long. ALL the characters are 3-dimensional—the aliens have their own language (although how they communicate with humans verbally, understanding each other’s language, is never quite explained, but doesn’t hinder the storyline) and speak it at all times (with English subtitles), giving us insight into their culture and history by observation, not just by some human explaining it to us.

Some might be put off by the overtly-obvious and oft-used theme of “evil humans”, but if you’re familiar with the history of South Africa at all, you realize that in this case, it cannot be ignored. Most of the humans depicted in the film, whether they’ve interacted with the aliens or not, view them as inferior (the slang term for them is “prawns”). The hapless Wikus especially maintains his negative view of the aliens; as his change progresses, all that matters is reversing the process, to the detriment of those around him, human and alien alike.

There is much more to be said about District 9, but I will end here for fear of giving away much more of the excellent plot and of repeating the comments of other reviewers. I can say definitively though, that District 9 was worth the hype, and if the ending is to be believed (and I certainly hope so), I look forward to more from Blomkamp and Jackson in the future. Rated R for bloody violence and pervasive language. 5/5

Weird Al Was Right--They're Reproducing in the Sewers!!

This bizarre video has been making the rounds of late, and is just on the cusp of becoming a viral sensation. Apparently, it's footage from inside a sewer pipe in Cameron Village, North Carolina, and shows some time of strange amorphous life forms living down there. I've been watching it obsessively for days now, and now I'd like to impart that obsession unto you:



OK. What the hell are they? Naturally, some have speculated some type of alien life form. I know, I know, no need to get all "Weekly World Report" about it. But really--what the hell ARE those things?? It's really freaking me out. Because they do seem to be alive. And having seen The Blob, The Thing, etc., I know that this can't end well...

VAULT VLOG: The Horrors... of the Transformers

Retro Review: The Blob (1958)

There's been so much said here recently, and in other places, in praise of the excellent--and admittedly superior--1988 remake of The Blob, that I thought it was high time someone showed some much-needed love to the original, Eisenhower-era drive-in classic. The Blob is a fine piece of pop horror entertainment, and deserves to be treated as the seminal sci-fi terror film that it is.

A young and very un-Steve-McQueen-like Steve McQueen makes his second official movie appearance starring as the one local boy who can help save his town from the menace of the all-consuming glob of red jelly from outer space. He's sort of a poor man's James Dean in this picture, which was clearly the intention of the filmmakers.

Because to my mind, The Blob is one of the first horror movies to overtly market itself to the teen demographic, something that is regularly done with horror movies today. You have a cast in which only the teenagers really know what's up, and the adults are ineffectual, lame authority figures. Sound familiar? Much time is given to the inter-character teen drama, and we even have a movie-within-a-movie, as the teen characters attend a horror movie marathon at their local cinema, an activity adolescent moviegoers of the day would've been very familiar with.

For some, the giant jello-like Blob may not be very scary, but this particular movie monster has always creeped me out. Once again, as with many horror flicks, it goes back to my childhood experience with the film. This was another one of those Sunday afternoon syndicated TV-aired movies in my area, and I will never forget viewing the Blob's initial appearance as a kid. When that poor old homeless drifter pokes around that smoldering meteorite, only to find himself elbow-deep in Blob--well that was the stuff of nightmares for me.

The aforementioned movie theater scene is an all-time classic of 1950s horror, and done quite well using the special effects of the day. The Blob of the remake may be more dynamic, animated and downright vicious, but there's something about that slow-moving morass of unthinking goo that sends shivers down the spine. I think it's the same element of classic zombie cinema that has always frightened me--the unrelenting, unthinking, amoral thing that will eventually get you no matter what.

Yes, there's a certain element of goofiness to this version, not least of which is the offbeat, yet hilarious theme song--co-written by a young Burt Bacharach, no less! But I think that it's all part of the charm of the original Blob. It's a perfect example of a "fun" horror movie, one that doesn't make you think too much, and you can just kick back and lose yourself in without really getting scared to the depths of your soul. I think sometimes we need horror like this to temper the rest of the ghastly stuff we enjoy so much.

I've always said that modern horror can sometimes take itself a bit too seriously, which is why I'll always have a soft-spot for the Golden and Silver Age classics, with their Forrest J. Ackerman-style sensibility and schlock factor. The 1950s seemed to be an era when this kind of quirky horror had its heyday, and The Blob, along with flicks like I Was a Teenage Werewolf, Z0mbies of Mora Tau and Invaders from Mars, is a perfect example. Enjoy it for what it is, and I assure you, a splendid time is guaranteed for all.

Hump-Day Harangue: Alien Prequel Needs Ridley Scott!

I have, on occasion, been accused of being a little too negative. Fair enough, I'm always open to criticism. Perhaps it's a little too easy to constantly go off on a rant tearing down this sequel or that remake, demanding that some movie or another not be made, as I did recently with the Saw franchise. So today, I'm going to take the high road. I'm going to come out in favor of a new sequel--or more accurately, a new prequel. But I have one very crucial condition.

I'm all for an Alien prequel. But only--I repeat, only--if Ridley Scott is the director.

I continue to be amazed every time I see it what an extremely well-crafted and terrifying film the original Alien is. It's one I never get tired of. I guess it's a "comfort movie" for me, you might say. And although I will never go as far as many others will and say that James Cameron's sequel Aliens is even better, it is also a hell of a movie. But since then, I've watched my beloved Alien franchise go through a slow and painful death.

First there was David Fincher's Alien-cubed, which I actually enjoyed, but which was flawed in a great many ways. Killing off Hicks and the little girl before the movie even starts was probably the single most egregious. From there, I'd rather not even talk about it. Aliens ripping out Nick Tortelli's brains in some farcical horror space comedy; two half-baked and ill-conceived Predator crossovers...it's enough to make me pull an Ash and start spouting 2-percent out of my bodily orifices.

So I'm all for returning the Alien franchise to its former glory. But it has to be done right. And the only man who can pull that off, as far as I'm concerned, is the man who realized Dan O'Bannon's incredible vision in the first place back in 1979. Some may suggest Cameron, but to me, the guy has lost his mind ever since becoming "King of the World". He can go direct another 3-D movie about fish, as far as I'm concerned. I want me some Ridley.

I'm not sure what this prequel would entail exactly, but Ridley Scott has proven enough to be so completely in touch with the material that I'm sure he'd do a bang-up job. Checking out the special features on the recent Alien special edition DVD was more than enough to further convince me of that. The man speaks with great passion for the material, and remarkable insight--while admitting to not even having been much of a fan of sci-fi or horror. Normally that's strike one in my book, but in his case I find it gives him even more credibility. He approached the project with a clean slate, and created something remarkably fresh and powerful in the process.

The good news is, according to Entertainment Weekly, that 20th Century Fox, which owns the rights to the franchise, is saying it will only greenlight a prequel if Ridley directs. Now, Scott was already signed on as a producer, but had hand-picked some German commercial director by the name of Carl Erik Rinsch to helm the picture. Boo. Luckily, here is one instance in which studio meddling may actually be serving a greater good.

No word yet on whether Ridley will buckle under the pressure and consent to once again direct the actions of stuntmen in H.R. Giger-designed bodysuits, but this blogger can hope with fingers and toes crossed. It's not like the guy's not active in the director's chair anymore, and it's not like he still doesn't pack a mighty punch, as the likes of Body of Lies and American Gangster have recently shown.

So make it happen, Mr. Scott. Show us you can save Alien from mediocrity and finish (?) the series out with a real bang. And help me wash those images of Nick Tortelli in space out of my brain...

A First Look at ABC's Remake of V !!!

Although she's no Jane Badler (yes, I'm a fan of '80s hotness), Morena Baccarin could invade my planet any day of the week, and twice on Sunday. ABC.com is showing off a couple of impressive clips of its upcoming remake of the classic '80s horror/sci-fi miniseries V, featuring the former Firefly star as Diana, evil leader of the Nazi-lizard invasion force. You can officially color me pumped for this:

ABC Announces First Star for Its V Remake

The recently announced greenlit remake of the 1980s classic miniseries V now has its first officially attached star. The Hollywood Reporter broke the news yesterday that Scott Wolf of Party of Five fame--last seen on ABC's ill-fated The Nine--will play the role of a TV newscaster who turns Baltar and becomes the Visitors' propaganda tool.

The new version of V is planned as an ongoing series, and is expected to follow a somewhat different narrative from the original. Meaning, don't expect any of the characters you knew from before. I'm thinking this thing is going to be heavily BSG-influenced.

* * * * * * * * * *

I wanted to thank all the contributors and readers who helped make the first-ever Cyber Horror Awards a success. If you head over to the awards page, you'll be able to read some gracious words from some of the winners, including Saw V director David Hackl, who won Best Production Design for Repo! The Genetic Opera. Here's hoping that the CHAs will become even bigger and better in the coming years!

ABC Greenlights "V" Remake

This is all very reminiscent of when Battlestar Galactica returned to TV five years ago. In spite of rumors last summer that original writer-producer-director Kenneth Johnson was close to securing a new sequel series to the classic '80s mini-series, it now appears that Johnson has been pushed out.

Instead, Warner Bros. TV, which owns the rights to the alien invasion franchise, has enlisted veteran TV producer Scott Peters (The 4400, Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles) to develop a remake miniseries, and according to Variety, ABC is officially on board.

The original miniseries, along with its first sequel miniseries and spin-off ongoing series, aired on NBC and told a tale of deceitful extraterrestrials who hide their true selves from us while secretly plotting the downfall of the human race. Although at the time it was an allegory for Nazi Germany, Peters plans to move away from that idea, while still focusing on the dangers of blind faith in leadership.

The remake will still follow the same basic premise, although the actual details of the storyline will be completely different. None of the characters will be the same, with the main plot focusing on a Homeland Security agent and her son, who becomes enamored of the aliens, much to the chagrin of his fed mommy.

There are also plans to develop a video game based on the miniseries, and I'm assuming the door will remain tentatively open for an ongoing series. It's a good day to be a V fan, but I can't help but feel sorry for poor ol' Kenneth Johnson, who had been working on his V sequel for NBC since 2005. Maybe they'll throw him a bone just like they did for Richard Hatch, and give him a supporting role in the new show...

Englund and Other Originals Out of New "V" Project

If you can ignore the '80s-hotness of Jane Badler for just a moment, I'd like to pass along some news on everyone's favorite sci-fi/horror TV miniseries. In talking to Cinema Blend at--you guessed it!--Comic-Con, V-veteran Robert Englund stated in no uncertain terms that the proposed new miniseries NBC has been developing for the past three years (!) will in fact be a complete remake, with new actors taking the place of people like himself, Marc Singer and Ms. Badler (pant, pant).

Judging by certain bone-headed complaints raised by peacock execs, it appears some of the hold-up may be over concerns that the new V miniseries will appear to have "ripped off" Independence Day. In other news, the new Dune movie is rumored to be "ripping off" Star Wars...Sigh...

TCM's Essentials Jr. Brings the Harryhausen

If you're like me, then you don't pass up any opportunity to expose your kids to the stuff that you really dug when you were a kid. Well, Turner Classic Movies has thought up a way to help those of us who will not rest until our offspring are as socially outcast as we once were. It's called The Essentials, Jr.

Fans of TCM recognize The Essentials as the channel's Saturday night series spotlighting the absolutely can't-miss gems of classic cinema. This month, they've introduced a less "serious" and more fun version intended to lure the kiddies into appreciating great movies from the golden age.

And coming up this Sunday night, The Essentials Jr. (hosted by Little Miss Sunshine's delightful Abigail Breslin and Batman & Robin's far-from-delightful Chris O'Donnell) presents Ray Harryhausen's 1957 chestnut 20 Millions Miles to Earth. The last of Harryhausen's special effects extravaganzas to be made in black and white, the movie tells the story of the implacable Ymir, a creature from the planet Venus who arrives on Earth and promptly begins to enlarge to alarming size and go on an old-school call-out-the-national-guard rampage.

It's a must-see for kids young and old, so whether you have procreated or not, I urge you to get yourself in front of the tube this Sunday for a true popcorn treat.

The Essentials, Jr. runs ever Sunday night. Future pics on the slate include the likes of Mutiny on the Bounty and Harvey.

First Time Around: Space Monsters

Hello, all. You can call me RayRay, the name so nice you say it twice.

I would like to say that I am honored to have been invited to contribute to this page. I was pretty much offered an outlet for my opinions, on subjects which I love, which are monsters and horror movies. I assumed books and stories were also part of the fare. For that I have to say: thank you.

I have to confess that horror is not my favorite genre. I would have to say that I am a bit more of a science-fiction/fantasy fan more than anything, but from there you get some of the best monsters. And honestly, I love monsters. And that is the one thing movies have over books - you get to see the monsters. And science-fiction horror is a big sub-genre, and has some of the best monsters, so I guess I am in the right ballpark. And I love me a good space monster, be it intelligent or just plain mean. And there are soooo many good monsters from outer space.

Let's see, there are the hunters from the "Predator" franchise. They were a pretty good concept, and the first movie, with Arnold, had some very serious horror elements, especially when the small commando unit finally figures out that they are actually being hunted. The scene occurs during broad daylight (albeit in the jungle) which really adds to the tension. You have Schwarzenegger looking around, bug-eyed, at this unseen force which had just (if memory serves) picked off one of his own men. The horror implications of the movie wear off, though, once it is Arnold alone, and the creature's camouflage stops working, and you can see it is a man in a suit. At this point it more or less devolves back into a pure action flick, though it is still a good movie.

The monster in Predator is scary when you can't see him, and don't what he's about, except he really likes spinal columns. The ability to move about the trees is also disconcerting, as is the speed and obvious toughness. But when you get your first good look at him, when he emerges from the river and his camo-unit goes haywire, he is somewhat strange, but aside from his mask and his huge size, it's just a really big man, and all tension is dissipated.

But one of the great monsters from outer space, and of all time, are the bio-mechanical, H.R. Geiger-created "Aliens." Sure, I know, this is nothing new. Everyone has seen the movies of this franchise. Everyone knows that this is a very scary set of monsters. But I want to put my own 2 cents in. The original, Ridley Scott's Alien, is a pure classic, and the follow up, James Cameron's aptly titled Aliens, is one of the few sequels which actually stands up to the original [See: The Godfather]. (I will not comment at this time about the following movies of this franchise, or the AVP series.) The monster is the secret of these two movies. Simply, it is one of the most terrifying monsters ever thought up. To quote: "Its structural perfection is matched only by its hostility." It is tough enough to withstand hard vacuum, and even a good blast by a spaceship's engines. It is essentially a black insectizoidal armored shell over what otherwise appears to be a humanoidal skeleton, but with a barbed tail, and a haunting eyeless face over a double mouth with teeth that appear to be metallic in nature. It is the very visage of soullessness - it is malevolent beyond a vicious animal; perhaps manufactured, but to what end? Even without eyes you can feel an inhuman consciousness burning into you, like when it is contemplating the cat, Jones, towards the end of Alien. And I haven't even mentioned its blood type or its less than charming form of procreation. It is almost industrialized horror made animal - manufactured in an assembly line, one of a series, in identical rows, oozing the slime from within the machine, precise in its actions, measured in its movements, hidden in the nooks of its nest. What isn't human is insect; what isn't flesh is chitin or metal. It is almost a realization of Kafka's bad dream, but we don't get to be the bug - the bug comes from us. All in all, I have long thought of this creature as the #2 scariest monster in horror, all time.

Now, that last sentence is begging a question: well, RayRay, what's the scariest monster of all time? I can tell you, and it is, in my humblest of opinions, also one of the best movies ever made: John Carpenter's The Thing. The Thing, you say? That bomb from 1981? The remake that was missing a cameo from James Arness? Yeah, that one. If you never saw it, then do so, and make sure the lights are out. If you don't want it spoiled for you, read no further.

There is nothing about this movie that is lacking. It is cast wonderfully. It's got a great script. It's screen shots and angles are great. The effects are top notch, and have held up for a quarter of a century, well into the CGI years (Rob Bottin did it right, and did it old school). And it has the single most terrifying monster of all time. The film combines the alienation from civilization with the alienation between the characters, where trust becomes the most valuable and vanishing commodity, in the midst of an Antarctic winter storm. And all with the lurking, oppressive horror of a monster that could be......is........one or more of the fellow men you are trapped with. Even after the monster is revealed for the first time - when it attacks the dogs in the kennel - it is immediately hidden again. This is the type of movie you watch over and over again, looking in the background to see if there was a raised eyebrow or a glance that you missed.

The Thing is such an effective monster as it can infiltrate at will; it can change shape at will; the forms it can take on are essentially unlimited; it possesses the souls of its victims (rare for a sci-fi monster from space); and when it attacks it...........well, what it does is not exactly explicable but it comes with generous helpings of slime and tentacles and wholly inhuman shapes, a horror of Lovecraftian proportions (more on the great HPL another time). As a victim you become just part of the creatures' coterie or its repertoire, depending on how you think of it. Also, once you begin to give it thought, the ramifications of this creature that absorbs its victims are troubling. Clearly, early in the movie at least one member of Outpost 31 is infected by the alien creature via the dog from the Norwegian base. Yet that person is not revealed until much, much later (it is either Norris, Palmer, or Blair, you never find out; and that person infects at least one or more of the others). At what point does that person cease to be that person? During the scene when MacReady, the putative hero, is performing the "blood and hot needle" tests, just before he tests Palmer's blood, you see resignation flash across Palmer's face. Is that Palmer, or the Thing, who is so resigned, sighing to himself? If it creates a perfect imitation, does the underlying person EVER stop being?

It is often forgotten (at least by me until it was pointed out) that MacReady, the pilot and aforementioned hero, takes a long helicopter ride to the site of the actual spaceship with the two characters that must have already been at least infected, if not full blown 'things' at the time - Palmer and Norris. Does anything happen off camera we don't find out about? Probably not, but that gnawing doubt is part of the essence of this monster.

Continuing, the "Thing" is no dumb animal. Whatever it is, it knows what it wants, and it wants to get the hell off Antarctica. And in furtherance of this it is building itself a SPACESHIP (!!) from the parts of terrestrial vehicles (while distracting the humans from discovering this activity). This is an extrememly intelligent creature (even if it is acquired intellect), with a lot of technical know-how (same caveat). Couple the toughness to lie dormant and frozen for a thousand centuries with all of the above, and the result is the most capable and frightening movie monster I can think of. Ever. All time. Period. At least to this casual observer.

Until next time, watch the skies.................

It Came from Hollywood: A History of Horror Movies, Part 3

Following the horrors of World War II, America became a vastly different place. This, in turn, profoundly affected the entertainment industry--particularly the fictional horrors of the movies. The gothic scares that had been all the rage during the '30s and '40s had lost their power. Classic creatures like Dracula, the Frankenstein Monster, the Wolf Man, et al simply no longer cut the mustard.
The new horrors of the world had much to do with modern science, and so it was in the 1950s that science-fiction and horror intersected like never before. It suddenly seemed like every other film had some sort of creature grow to gigantic proportions thanks to atomic age radiation--whether it be ants (Them!, 1954), spiders (Tarantula, 1955), or just about anything else. Even human monsters were mutations created through mishaps of science--most notably in the 1958 chiller The Fly.
Extending the sci-fi horror theme to include another great fear of the 1950s--the Red Scare--the genre unloaded a barrage of flicks having to do with alien invasions, including The Blob (1958), The Thing from Another World (1951), and the one which most closely paralleled Eisenhower-Era America's terror of communist takeover, Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1956).There were some exceptions to the rule. Gothic horror still had a bit of life left in it, as evidenced by the landmark House of Wax (1953), the first major 3-D production. It also helped establish the career of one Vincent Price, a refined art lover and Yale graduate who had been working in Hollywood since the late 1930s without much notice. Following up with two Fly pictures as well as House on Haunted Hill (1959), Price was a new horror icon before the decade was out.
Meanwhile, across the Atlantic Ocean in the U.K., a new movie studio was taking shape that would become at the same time both a throwback and a groundbreaker. Hammer Films was a production house built almost completely for the creation of horror movies. Particularly, they were interested in reinventing the classic monsters of old, with a modern flair. Kicking things of with 1957's The Curse of Frankenstein, and following through with 1958's Horror of Dracula and 1959's The Mummy, Hammer brought back the old baddies, this time in bold technicolor, and--most shockingly of all--with plenty of blood. A taboo throughout much of the history of the horror genre, the use of blood became a Hammer trademark, and would most certainly be a sign of things to come. Along the way, Hammer made horror legends of director Terence Fisher and actors Christopher Lee and Peter Cushing.
Yet the promise of Hammer was a deceptive one. While the graphic violence would hint at what the next turbulent decade had in store for the genre, horror would nevertheless move further away from its gothic roots than ever before, and land smack dab in the real world. In the 1960s, the monsters would become us.
Other major releases:

• The Beast from 20,000 Fathoms (1953)
• Invaders from Mars (1953)
• Creature from the Black Lagoon (1954)
• Gojira (1954)
• It Came from Beneath the Sea (1955)

Part 1: The Silent DeadPart 2: Gods & Monsters
Soon to come: Part 4 - The Times They Are a-Changin'